Tag Archive for 'art'

Doodle Factory for 2-16-08

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Our clients recently put in an order for 12,000 units of doodles, so it’s time for the factory to ramp up production. Let’s check in and see what those hard workin’ blue collarin’ doodle manufacturers are rolling off the assembly lines.

Frenchman

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I was not always as worldly as I am now. In fact I used to have some strange ideas about other cultures and peoples. Take this depiction of a Frenchman for example. With the benefit of experience under my belt I no longer believe the French are a people of hammer wielding, spike footed lunatics with the jaws of an over-sized dung beetle. See that thing to the upper left of his head? It’s a Jerrycan full of gasoline being poured onto his mouth parts. See that small thing flying in from the left side of the image? It’s a lit match.

 

Eric the Red

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Another example of my razor sharp wit, this is a drawing of famous viking leader Eric the Red. Originally this drawing was in blue ball point pen, hence Eric’s protest. Also, just in case you don’t know what a ruler is, I decided to illustrate one below Eric. Now that I have given you all a ruler drawing maybe I can FINALLY stop getting email requests for them.

 

Gunpowder Pope

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That sounds like a great name for a band. This doodle springs from the eternal question: “What if the Pope suddenly began to turn into gunpowder, leaving a flammable trail wherever he went?” At least that was a nagging question in my mind during this doodle’s production. Looks like all those candles the catholics like so much finally caught up to the old Vicar of Christ.

That’s it for this installment. Check back for more drawings by a retard so you can laugh and throw virtual beer cans at him.

Everybody!  Here’s more Doodle Factory!  HEEEAAAAHALALKHSDFOIS!

-Andy

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Entrecard Anti-Contest Entrants!

For contest rules see one post down, or go here. Basically, send me a drawing of either a unicorn or Arnold Schwarzenegger and you get a chance to win 1000 EC credits.

Now on to the Entries!

C-Squared over at An Unsuspecting Notebook is the first to enter with this work of wonderment and beauty:

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I don’t know what’s going on here, but that unicorn’s horn looks like rolled up newspaper.

BigPappa from the depths of The Big Bald Blog emerged long enough to spit this image forth:

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Now that, my friends, is magical. Also I think he wanted you to see this.

Claire who writes A little piece of me had a seizure at the computer while MS Paint was open and sent me the results:

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Lookit them evil yellow eyes.

Chelle B. at The Offended Blogger sent me a multi-media work in graphite and clip art.

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It’s a good thing you included your name. Don’t want anyone else claiming credit for this masterpiece.

Here’s Deb of Deb on the Rocks. What has she got for us?

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What?!? No.

Kevin at Review Bunker takes us back in time with old school Arnold:

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Old school Arnold with grade school skills. Nice ankle muscles he has too.

Let’s welcome Asara from Asara’s Mental Meanderings. Looks like she decided to render Arnold in the roll he was born to play:

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Arnold vs the Confetti Streamers!

Susie of Pencil Drawing Sketch Art fame attempts Arnie in a, well, pencil drawing sketch.

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So life like I feel like I could reach out and touch it.

That’s it for now. More to be added as I receive them!

-Andy

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Entrecard Anti-Contest…Contest

Subscribe to my Feed? NO!

Make a billion comments on my posts to make me look like Mr. Popular? NO!

Shit up your own blog by writing about my retarded contest on it? HELL NO!

Here at Station Atomica we do things differently. If there’s one thing I’ve learned since starting this site, it’s that I hate contests. Some people may love ‘em to death and put a new one up every other day, but for me it would be compromising my content, shitty as it already is. In the words of Jean-Luc Picard in First Contact, “The line must be drawn HERE! This far, NO FARTHER!”

monopolymoney.jpgYou see, I am not about to offer anything valuable in a contest, because if I had anything like that I would have transformed it into video games and hookers with the magic of the free market. And I’m not going to do a standard win-some-Entrecard-credits by-sucking-Station-Atomica-off, because nobody cares. In fact, for those of you who don’t know what “Entrecard credits” are, feel free to substitute the words “Monopoly money” in their place.

So here’s the deal. I’ll give 1000 EC credits to one lucky entry in my anti-contest contest. Entry is easy, and fun too! All you have to do is:

  • Send me an email (address is at the bottom of this post) with your chosen online moniker. Use anything you want. But try to make it something you wouldn’t mind being published.
  • Include a link to your Entrecard website where I’ll send the phat lewt if you happen to win.
  • Now here’s the fun part. Attached to this email there has to be an image of your making. Use MS Paint, Photoshop, or the finest oil paints on canvas, it doesn’t matter. Artistic ability won’t really get you any closer to winning.
  • The image itself has to depict one of the following: A Magical Unicorn, or Arnold Schwarzenegger from memory. Here’s an example:

 

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The catch is that when you send me these images, I am going to slap them right up on my website for the whole world to see! Each entry will appear with your name and a link back to your website from the email! Oh yeah, by entering this contest you are giving me permission to post your image and bla bla bla. Lets recap:

  • Make a crappy 5 minute doodle
  • Send an email
  • Sit back while I put a link to your site up, and possibly give you 1000 EC credits.

Contest ends on Sunday whenever I feel like it, and the winner will be chosen based on a super secret formula. Like I said, artistic ability counts for squat, but if you make an especially deformed drawing that makes me laugh, that counts for a lot. Entries will be judged without regard to the sender, so if you are my BFF it won’t matter one iota. Let’s see your creative side, people!

 Here are the current entrants.

-Andy

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.GIF Critique Theatre for 1-30-08

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Welcome, seekers of the inner truth, to .GIF Critique Theatre. This week we examine .GIF art portraying environmental themes, and the place humanity takes in this environment. .GIF image artistry has a long and complex relationship with the natural world, going back many couples of years. I hope you will find as much mental sustenance for your questing mind as I do in these masterworks of the grand art of .GIFcraft.

Growing Tree

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The growing tree is an example of the meticulous design and attention to pacing that is a hallmark of early English .GIF artistry. Notice the slight pause the swaying tree makes as the human emerges for the first time from betwixt its verdant foliage. Notice, too, the lingering shot of the ejected human on the ground. This was intentionally done to give the viewer time to mentally register the message this .GIF holds before launching into another iteration.

And just what is this message? Obviously the artist was attempting to portray the link mankind has with the natural world. Indeed this piece emphasizes the fact that we are born of Mother Nature’s womb, for where else would we have our genesis? Man is not present until the lush greenery has fully billowed forth. Interesting is man’s attempt to escape this natural eden, and the tree’s violent response to this.

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As complex thematically as this work is, the artist failed to pay heed to execution. Man is a crudely depicted facsimile who does not engender sympathy. The artist squanders an opportunity for greater emotional impact and identification in his careless depiction of man’s form at the mercy of a vengeful Mother Earth.

Tools2

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Tools2 is the second in the series “What Hath Man Wrought” by Egyptian .GIF artist Sammar Jones. The series deals with modern technology in relation to the human condition, and specifically asks the question, “Are we truly better off for technology’s presence?”

In a VoIP interview, we asked Sammar Jones about the inspiration for his work.

“I have strong feelings that technology is impeding mankind’s humanity. For instance, Just the other month I had flown in to New York on business. I was on my cellphone with my wife, who was going to undergo a minor operation to remove a painful cyst, when a careless passerby on a bicycle skidded through a puddle of water and splashed me. I was so angry that day that I nearly dropped my ipod while shaking my fist.”

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“Now, had we never invented the wheel, the rude individual would not have been biking, and I would not have been wet. If mankind had never developed clothing I would not have had my soaked underwear riding up my crack all afternoon. In these ways we are living in a technological hell.”

“My work is like that. The hammer pounds and pounds, but for all its complexity and space age materials it can not drive the nail home. It’s circuitry and superconducting polarized ionic head is not able to perform the task a simple rock would have no trouble completing.”

Overwater

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Overwater is very similar in theme to Jones’s Tools2, but the execution and mood are entirely different. Instead of dwelling in a negative way about the harm technology has done to man’s satisfaction, the artist here focuses on the beauty of nature in such a way as to make all of man’s scientific progress seem trite. The airplane literally hovers motionless as we are captivated by the completely natural lapping of waves.

This work makes the point that, although we live in a jungle of concrete and stainless steel, the beauty of nature can be had just by the act of shifting our focus. In the artist’s mind communing with nature has healing properties in an artificial setting. Yes, we have the ability to fly to our destination in a gas fueled mechanized airplane, but might we also swim in the cooling waters of Mother Earth with the destination being the same?

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Thank you, kind reader, for your patronage at the .GIF Critique Theatre. We do hope you will peruse our gallery during our next show, a look at the .GIF image in the political arena.

Previous .GIF gallery shows

-Andy

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Bacon is Very Good

A lazy Sunday calls for a lazy update. Or an inspired one, you make the call. All I know is that I woke up with an intense desire for bacon today, and my thoughts drifted to this painting I made some time back. Acrylic on canvas, 10×10 in.

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So tell me what emotions this piece brings out in you. What symbolism do you see? Are you a bacon person or do you prefer sausage? I bet you prefer sausage, you seem like the type.

-Andy

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