I have decided to modify my update schedule to the following:
Monday, Wednesday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday
Why? Because it is my site and you aren’t the boss of me. Also people seem to come here on Mondays more than anything else, so I figure I should give the crowds what they want. Anyways, here is a picture of an alien murdered by an insane homeless guy in the woods. Enjoy.
-Andy
Station Atomica will have been around for one month starting on the 9th of January, 2008. With this much experience under my belt I believe I am qualified to make blanket statements regarding internet advertising and MAKIN’ MONEY ONLINE, so here goes:
ADSENSE CAN SHOVE A COFFEE MUG UP ITS ASS
Unlike some self righteous jerks I am not pretending to be a bastion of internet free speech and integrity. The reason for this is simply that no one cares or ever will care about that. It has been my plan from day one to paste ads over every square inch of space my layout allows. Fortunately I have people to hold me back and remind me that I should produce actual content with which I can generate traffic with which I can bla bla bla I want money.
I’m not doing this for free folks, The only reason I’m putting up with the AdSense crap is that maybe someday it will generate enough income so that I can cut back on my other job testing wooden dowels for the Singapore penal system by having them broken over my ass. People talk about selling out like it is a bad thing. Well here is a partial list of things I would sell out for:
Now some may say, “Be patient, you need more traffic to really get any results. The money will come eventually.” Well I would be inclined to agree if it were not for two facts: One is that I have made less than three bucks on AdSense this whole time, and two is that AdSense if totally schizophrenic.
Here is a look at some of the more insane ads Google has decided my blog is a good match for:
I’m really going to enjoy seeing the ads for this update. No I won’t take the Google ads down until I get off my ass and put something better in its place.
-Andy
Now that I’m settled in to writing Station Atomica like the scorpion nestled in your favorite shoes I will be trying to implement an update schedule. After a hard day working in the razor- blade-and-lemon-juice mines sometimes all I have time for is falling onto my bed of scavenged carpet discards from the local home improvement store and sobbing softly until I succumb to exhaustion.
Full updates on Saturday, Sunday, Tuesday, Thursday, and Friday.
I may throw in a Monday or Wednesday update here and there, but that depends on how fast I can dress my wounds before night falls and I have to fight off the coyotes trying to feast on my succulent flesh. To console you here is a picture of Mikhail Gorbachev I drew in my notebook sometime in high school.
-Andy
I don’t know if anyone else has noticed, but in the last few years something magical has happened to our beloved internet. More accurately something has changed in the way the general public perceives it. I’m not talking about stories on the nightly news about the thousands of greasy pedophiles all hauling ass in their windowless vans with a busy schedule to keep of molesting every child on the internet ever. No those have always existed and always will exist till the end of time.
What I am talking about is the fact that it is now socially acceptable to be a nerd. Even more shocking is the fact that you aren’t one of the cool kids unless you have a myspace or a facebook. It is almost as if it is seen as acceptable to sit down in front of a computer or have an email address. Is the internet…hip now? Perhaps even radical?
I am going to blame the whole Web 2.0 scam that has been floating around for a while now. That is why I have established the Station Atomica Web 2.0 Oversight and Evaluation Board (myself being the director as well as the sole member.) My goal is to quantify the effects of this development and find out what the heck is up with this crap, because while acceptance of the internet by society at large may seem like a good idea there will undoubtedly be some side effects. For instance I am now able to openly walk down the street wearing my favorite pair of Spock ears and talk about how I am a blogger without being thrown into a vat of acid inside of an insane asylum. We all agree that this is a good thing, but as a result of our new tolerance of nerddom is the fact that somebody can make an entire website detailing their obsession with drawing closeups of cat’s assholes and then link back to catassholegallery.com in their facebook account. And we are supposed to be okay with this.
Station Atomica might be new to the blogosphere, but I don’t think we are too late to hold back the tide of user created garbage that is the hallmark of Web 2.0. Let’s fight the good fight and put those horrid corners of the internet in the spotlight and see what oozes out of them like an especially scabby wound on the already festering tumor that is the internet.
-Andy
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